5 Recent U.F.O. Sightings the Media Totally Ignored

5 Recent U.F.O. Sightings the Media Totally Ignored

WHETHER YOU BELIEVE THERE ARE OTHERS IN THE UNIVERSE, or whether you’re on the fence about the others, or whether you’re a skeptic who thinks that people who believe in U.F.O.s ate too many paint chips as children, I think we can all agree that at least some U.F.O sightings should be reported so we can come to our own conclusion about the possibility of life on other planets.

There are hundreds of sightings that happen all over the world on a daily basis, all it takes is for ONE of those sightings to be legit and our entire view of ourselves, the world and the universe would significantly change.

Since the news isn’t doing its job in that area, we donned our reporter hat (we stuck a post-it that says ‘reporter’ on a baseball cap.) and found some recent U.F.O. findings that the media has ignored.

1. U.F.O. Ruins at the Bottom of the Baltic Sea

Skeptics always say that for “extraordinary claims such as U.F.O.s they require extraordinary evidence” or something really pompous like that; however, last year, what could totally classify as extraordinary evidence found at the bottom of the Baltic Sea was barely reported.

On June 19, 2012, three members of an underwater exploration team found something unexplained at the bottom of the Baltic Sea, somewhere between Sweden and Finland.  Upon further observation, what they found was simply mind boggling.

The object had right angles, walls that were completely smooth, inside there was something resembling a staircase and cavity-like corridors. It was 180 meters in circumference, 200 feet across and they also found ‘skid’ marks leading to the object, (where it skidded on the ocean floor before crashing?). Upon attempting to film the object, the diver’s camera stopped working when they approached it along with their other electrical devices.  These devices magically turned on again after they swam away from the object.

Of course, this seemingly remarkable discovery was just a blip on the news with the conclusion that maybe it was just a bunch of sandstone rocks. How sandstone rocks could screw with electronic devices remains as big of a mystery as Ke$ha screwing with autotune and inexplicably creating a ‘music’ career out of it.

2. U.F.O. near the sun

Sometime in March of last year, an orbiting NASA space telescope captured something on camera  that looked like the sun had a major dangleberry. Awkward!

It was an odd sight to see a black mass floating so close to the sun with a long hose or funnel of some type that extended from the object to the sun.

Experts have since declared this as a ‘prominence.’ Nasa says, “A solar prominence (also known as a filament when viewed against the solar disc) is a large, bright feature extending outward from the Sun’s surface.”

Prominences are anchored to the sun’s surface and extend outwards into the sun’s hot outer atmosphere, called the corona. Despite this being a regular occurrence, it’s still strange that we haven’t captured or seen it on film.  We’re also totally disappointed that it wasn’t  a dangleberry or an attempt by the Sun to be up on pop culture by making its own one-nut Lance Armstrong joke.

3. Floating lights in Belgium/March 2013

Imagine waking up in the middle of the night to take a piss and outside your window, Shea Stadium is floating right by the roof of your house. You’d either think you were dreaming or accidentally salted your dinner with bath salts.

Oddly enough, this happened to someone in Belgium who was full-on bath salt free and totally awake. He made a trip to the bathroom at midnight and realized his hallway was as bright as day, so bright that even his wife woke up. They looked out the window and saw a huge row of floating lights outside. The man took some photos of the strange object before he went back to bed with an empty bladder and a head full of questions.

The next morning, there were no reports of any activity in the area to warrant the strange lights. There was no construction sites nearby, no giant cranes and the Air Force radar detection stated that there were no flights scheduled at that time. There were other witnesses who saw the same thing but so far, no one has an explanation about the mysterious lights that parked above their apartment complex. (Go home aliens, you’re drunk.)

4. Fleet of U.F.O.s at ISS – February 28, 2013

On February 28, 2013, NASA caught something interesting on the ISS Live Stream. In the video, there appears to be a group of UFO’s flying towards  our space station like a drunk looking for a fight.

Thankfully it disappeared from the camera a couple minutes later. What could it have been?

Space debris flying around in space probably wouldn’t be flying in such an organized fashion. Whether or not this was intelligent life checking up on their sea monkeys (us) or just strange random lights and gases in space trying to get some attention, it seems like these types of things should be reported on the news more often than Kim Kardashian getting a blood bukkake. 

5. Unusual “Vehicle” Caught on Mars

As the Mars Rover is busy up there doing what can only be described as extreme Instagramming, it has captured some very detailed picture of the Mars surface and from the looks of it, a Mars invasion isn’t happening soon.  But does this mean that there has always been no life on Mars?  As the pictures come in, it’s kind of interesting how Mars would look exactly like Arizona if you put in a few strip malls and TexMex taco shops.

It’s also interesting that they would drive such gas guzzlers like this weird, Hummer type vehicle that was in one of the images captured by Mars Rover.

There’s been a lot of rock formations on Mars that UFO enthusiasts have picked apart and claimed to have found faces, structures and artifacts lying willy nilly over the Mar’s surface. This “vehicle” was a lot harder to pass off as just another coincidental rock formation as there appears to be right angles and an obvious deliberate design.

Is this really a “vehicle?” Another trick of the light with a dash of imagination? Do you think AAA in Mars is totally expensive and they had to abandon their vehicles to the elements whenever it broke down? If this really is some sort of vehicle, do you think MTV would resurrect Pimp My Ride so they could put a sun roof and some blue flames on that sucker, because Mars inhabitants obviously need a lesson in style.

Best sightings of 2012

And as if we haven’t blown your mind enough, check out the best U.F.O. sightings you probably didn’t hear about in 2012.

Written by Elaine Chaney, who aliens can easily lure into a U.F.O. with pork rinds and a pina colada wine cooler. Follow the nutty koo-koos that fall out of her ass on Twitter and check out her sausage parties on Shedens.com.

Related on The Smoking Jacket:
6 Signs You’ve Been Abducted by Aliens 
Ask TSJ: Am I in Touch with Aliens?