MAN CRUSH OF THE WEEK: PHILIP HUMBER
Based on Philip Humber’s name alone, you would probably assume he sucks at sports. If he was playing a pickup sport, you would pretty much have to draft the guy named ‘Philip Humber’ last (unless everyone playing were butlers). But Humber went out and achieved probably the hardest thing to do in sports and threw just the twenty-first perfect game in history.
Among the players on that list include Cy Young, Sandy Koufax, Randy Johnson and now Philip Humber (granted it also includes Charlie Robertson and Len Barker). Regardless, it’s an incredible feat, even if he probably walked the last batter of the game and if it came against the Mariners when it’s probably more impressive when a pitcher doesn’t throw a perfect game against them.
Humber was the third overall pick in 2001 by the Mets, blew out his elbow, had Tommy John surgery, and was never the same pitcher. The velocity never returned and he was traded in the Johan Santana deal. He ended up getting claimed off waivers twice and joined the White Sox where he turned his whole career around. He was pretty much a complete bust and now will forever be mentioned in baseball history.
Plus Humber became the seventh former Met to throw a no-hitter after leading the organization continuing the streak of the Mets never throwing a no-hitter in their history and being really bad a doing good baseball stuff.
When I was a kid I used to throw the ball off my house dreaming of throwing a perfect game. Philip Humber is one of only 21 people who can ever say that have. Now I dream of getting a tweet from Kate Upton, something Humber also has now achieved.
DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: METTA WORLD PEACE
I like Ron Artest/Metta World Peace. I think he’s generally misunderstood and an interesting character who just sometimes gets one too many cups thrown at him while he’s laying out and starts beating dudes up.
Since World Peace joined the Lakers he’s been a good guy. Until he dunked and did what everyone does after making a nice play–he tried to kill the head of James Harden.
As much as I enjoy World Peace, James Harden is probably the coolest guy in the NBA. Besides the best facial hair in professional sports, he is also super good and really fun to watch. What I don’t like watching is him get concussed by World Peace.
Really the problem was that Harden touched World Peace during his celebration, which I don’t think should be surprising to really anyone that it would set him off since he’s a reformed crazy guy. When you watch the play live it looks like he was just finishing his cool celebration move when an elbow throw flourish, but when watching in slow motion you can see Harden clearly touches him so he knows someone is right that. And it looks like pretty much the worst thing ever.
World Peace was suspended for seven games (this is my favorite sentence I ever wrote). James Harden is still unsure of when he’ll return, something that could have major implications for the Thunder’s championship hopes/my continuing love of all things James Harden. It was stupid, dirty, and it ruined all hopes of World Peace clearing up his name. Something he desperately needed after his stand-up attempts.
Follow Scott Bolohan on Twitter: @scottbolohan