Dragon Drinks for “Game of Thrones” Plebes

FIRST OFF, you have to decide if you’re having yourself a Game of Thrones drinking game or a Game of Thrones  drinks night. Give this some thinking cap time. Mull this shit over. Mull it over good and thorough. You done? You decided?

YES, of course you can combine the two, genius, but the tricky part is if you decide to have a swig every time you see a tit you’re gonna have to get up and mix another cocktail, and that ain’t no fun, given how often you’re gonna be getting up to mix and/or piss at the GOT tit-showing rate.

Plus: Drinking game is more fun if it’s shots, yeah? That’s where the TSJ interns are at, anyhoos.

So. You want the drinking?

Here’s some Game of Thrones cocktails. Just 4 U.

DRAGON LADY

WHAT YOU REQUIRE

  • 2 ounces bourbon
  • 1 jalapeño pepper
  • 1/4 ounce simple syrup
  • 1/4 ounce lime juice
  • 5 blackberries
  • 1 small orange peel

DIRECTIONS

  • Mush up the pepper and blackberries in a mixing bowl
  • Add the rest of the ingredients, plus some ice into a shaker and shake shake shake
  • Strain the lot into a martini glass
  • This is the dragon-y part: Light a small orange peel on fire and drop into the glass

THE BASTARD OUT ON A COLD NIGHT

WHAT YOU REQUIRE

  • 2 ounces bourbon
  • 1 ounce Berentzen Apfelkorn
  • Splash of the oldest scotch you got (if you gotta steal it from your step-momma’s cabinet, so be it)
  • 2 dashes angostura bitters to remind you how bitter you are
DIRECTIONS
  • Throw all ingredients into a cocktail shaker
  • Add ice and stir, a lot, or for 20 like or 30 seconds (feels like too long? picture walking the wall)
  • Strain into a chilled glass and enjoy, but don’t enjoy too much because, you know, WINTER IS COMING, etc.

THE WINTERFELL

WHAT YOU REQUIRE

  • 1 bottle Irish stout beer
  • 2 ounces apple brandy
  • 1 ounce amaretto
  • 1 ounce maple syrup

DIRECTIONS

  • Pour the beer into a beer mug or challice or goblet or whatever you have on hand until approximately two-thirds full — you’re still hopeful like that
  •  Combine the brandy, amaretto and maple syrup in a regular glass, if you’ve got any of that fancy stuff around
  • Pour the brandy mixture into the pint glass/challice/goblet with the beer and enjoy — it might be your last drink, after all

DRINK FOR AN INCESTUOUS MOFO (OR, UM, BRO-FO)

 

WHAT YOU REQUIRE

  • 1 ounce of rum
  • 1 ounce of 99 Apples
  • 2 ounces of Sprite
  • 1 l’il squirt of Grenadine 
DIRECTIONS
  • Pour 1 shot 99 apples into bottom of lowball
  • Then add the Grenadine and 2 ounces of ye olde Sprite
  • Drizzle in the last 1 ounce of rum
  • Do your family members look hotter? Not our problem

The Game of Thrones Cocktails from TipsyBartender

Related on The Smoking Jacket:
On the Sauce: National Whiskey Sour Day
On the Sauce: A Jarful of Rotgut and Two Sheets to the Wind

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