Man Crush vs. Douchebag: La Gorce Country Club vs. Kris Humphries

Man Crush of the Week: La Gorce Country Club

Generally Man Crushes are people, not places in Miami Beach where a bunch of rich people go golfing and discussing watches (I have no idea what rich people talk about).

But this is a special exception. It’s like in every movie when someone finally stands up to the bad guy and all the sudden the other characters get all hopeful and rally behind him and the bad guy finally changes his ways. Except in this case the bad guy is Michael Jordan.

So Michael Jordan, besides being the best basketball player of ever, is also the worst dresser alive today. The man is probably the most iconic person alive and yet people let him do whatever he wants, mostly because of that whole being iconic stuff. It leads to some pretty horrible selections of clothing. Just check out this amazing website.

Michael decided to go golfing in cargo shorts, against La Gorce’s policy of wearing Bermuda shorts. Some of the other members heroes complained so on the twelfth hole MJ was approached and asked if he would change his shorts. He declined. The club has now said he will not be invited back.

A couple things here. Under no circumstance should Michael Jordan ever be wearing cargo shorts. Not on a cargo plane, not while watching the 2009 thriller, Cargo, not even if he has like six Gatorades he needs to carry but doesn’t feel like holding in his hands. Just don’t do it.

We as a nation have let Michael Jordan get away with way too much. It’s time to follow La Gorce’s lead and put an end to it.

Douchebag of the Week: Kris Humphries

I know Kris Humphries gets a lot of heat for having sex with an attractive Kardashian. He’s a pretty solid basketball player who otherwise doesn’t do too many things worth people hating him for. I’ve found myself defending him more than I would have ever hoped to in my life.

But then he decided to flagrantly foul touch Kevin Garnett’s face. If there’s one thing you should know in life, it’s not to mess with Kevin Garnett. Luckily for Kris Humphries, it wasn’t KG who went after him, but the much smaller Rajon Rondo.

Rondo shows sign of KG levels of crazy so it wasn’t really much of a surprise. Rondo ended up pushing Humphries into the crowd where Humphries managed tosomehow take off Rondo’s jersey while suffering some scratches.

Usually I wouldn’t make too much of a big deal about this since Humphries really didn’t do anything wrong (the removing of the jersey thing is a little harder to defend) but then Humphries had to go and ruin any goodwill he could have had from this pushing match by tweeting a picture of his scratches. Granted, they looking a little painful. But dude. You are in the NBA. You are 6’6”. A dude who is half a foot smaller than you scratched you a couple times. You don’t need to play the victim here.

Maybe he’ll get a reality show now, though.

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Follow Scott Bolohan on Twitter: @scottbolohan

Related on The Smoking Jacket:
Jack Taylor vs. The Big 10
Doug Martin vs. The Los Angeles Lakers 
Barry Zito vs. Lane Kiffin
Jack Sock vs. Lance Armstrong

 

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