Bring on the bacon cheeseburgers, folks, because fat guys do it better (or, they can at least do it for longer—which, for most women, implies better). Salon.com recently reported that researchers from Erciyes University in Turkey just completed a yearlong study on how a man’s BMI impacts his sexual performance, and the results show that heavier guys last longer in the sack—six-and-a-half minutes longer, to be exact. The heavier men who participated in the study were able to last an average of seven minutes and 18 seconds, while the lighter men only lasted an average of one minute and 48 seconds. As with all of these sorts of scientific studies, we are curious about the methodology. Did a bunch of Turkish researchers in lab coats stand around with stopwatches and time men of various sizes while they got down and dirty with their girlfriends? That just seems like it would be uncomfortable for everyone involved.
In any event, the researchers who conducted the study attributed the difference in finish times to the fact that fat men have higher levels of female hormones than skinny men. Apparently higher levels of female hormones slow a man’s natural progression toward orgasm. Subsequently, the more unmasculine a guy’s body, the more likely he is to be a better lover. Does this mean that skinny, manly-looking women climax faster, like a guy? The study doesn’t say, but we can’t help but wonder. Regardless, if you are a fit man who is a bit of a Speedy Gonzales in the boudoir, you might consider putting your weights down, kicking back and chunking up a little—just the advice you’ve been waiting all your life to receive.