Everyone loves to see their favorite celebrity doing something great. But even more than that, people really love seeing a celebrity they don’t particularly care for getting smacked in the grill with foreign objects. And it’s that very thing that we’re here to celebrate today.
Here are eight great moments in celebrities getting hit in the face history…
Fabio Gets Goosed
The only reason this one barely makes the list is because we don’t actually see what caused the blood and destruction on Fabio’s face. We don’t see it in this video, but we all know what it was. It was a goose. A suicidal goose decided it was going to take its precious life, and decided the best way to make that happen was with a kamikaze mission right into Fabio’s tender face meat. You’re a hero to us all, little goose.
Justin Bieber Gets Bottle Service
This is a special moment. We’re all used to seeing a small, usually only partially filled water bottle flying in the direction of a performer on stage. But when the venue brings out the big guns and puts Justin Bieber on-stage unexpectedly, the haters in the audience must follow suit and react in an equally overblown manner. So, Justin Bieber doesn’t get a regular bottle hurled at his head. He gets a gigantic bottle hurled at his head. And it’s a hit!
Rajon Rondo Keeps His Calm With Balls In His Face
The blow to the face isn’t especially forceful in this video, but it scores extra points for timing. Rajon Rondo is being interviewed during practice when, all of the sudden, one of his teammates in the background gets that “ooh shit, the ball is about to hit something” look on his face. Turns out, that ball was about to strike Rajon Rando right on the cheek.
Remarkably, he keeps the interview going for a few seconds after the fact, but eventually displays the appropriate response by stepping back and taking a few seconds to start swearing.
Perez Hilton Wants to Stop the Violence
Some people get hit in a bar fight and wear the black eye like a badge of honor. Some people get in a bar fight and immediately contact the police (unless they win, of course). And some people, like Perez Hilton, use a bar fight as an excuse to make a rambling, 8-minute video about how people getting punched in the face is the cause of all the wars in the world. Or something along those lines. Whatever he’s getting at, it’s way too dramatic for a simple punch to the face.
Lady Gaga Gets the Nicest Possible Blow to the Head
If you’re going to get hit in the head, this is probably the best, most loving way it can happen. In this video, Lady Gaga is performing “Poker Face” when an adoring fan tosses some flowers on stage. In this case, though, “on stage” means “right to the side of Lady Gaga’s head.” Nice shot!
Bret Michaels Gets Hammered By a Stage Prop
Listen, if you’re going to claim to be a “rocker” and then show up fancy-footing around on the stage at the Tony Awards, you have to expect that the rock gods are going to seek some kind of vengeance. In this case, it just so happens that Bret Michaels is the target of their fury, getting struck down in one of the most Spinal Tap-friendly manners imaginable.
Tom Cruise Is Appalled
Hey, why would you do this? No, seriously, why would you do such a thing to Tom Cruise? He was in Risky Business, you know. And speaking of risks, you’re taking a huge one by blasting Scientology’s official ambassador to planet Earth in the face with a squirt gun disguised as a microphone.
Why would you do that? Because it’s funny? It’s not funny. It’s hilarious. But it’s not funny. You have offended Tom Cruise. Xenu is not pleased.
Paula Deen Catches a Ham (With Her Face)
Of all the things you expect to see hurtling through the air towards your face, a gigantic ham has to be one of the least likely candidates. But it happened to Paula Deen. We’re not sure where she was, some kind of joyous celebration of ham, apparently. Everyone’s slapping high fives and applauding and just having a general blast basking in the pork deliciousness of ham. And then, all of that excitement goes overboard and people start chucking huge pieces of meat all around the room.
Not only does Paula Deen get hit, but she walks off the scene with a classic viral video line for the ages.