BACON, NFL, CHIP ROWE, MR. SKIN, MARK MARGOLIS, TITTY PICKS AND SEX FACTOR!
The recent warnings of a potential global bacon shortage has been sending shockwaves through the non-Kosher, meat-eating world. Major League Eating, which sponsors gluttonous eating contests that range from cannolis to hot dogs announced it is suspending all of its bacon contests for the time being. We talked to Richard Shea about the GBS (Global Bacon Shortage) and how it is affecting competitive eating! On the other hand, it appears the Bacon Shortage may not be as bad as we think. Cindy Cunningham the spokesperson for theNational Pork Board spoke with us and helped clear things up!
We did an update with our Fantasy Girls Teams today! With all the recent rumors and photos in the spotlight, who is winning…?
(Jaron) Miami Dollfins: Ashlee Greene, Demi Lovato, Mama June- Honey Boo Boo’s Mom, Rhianna, Andrea Lowell, Evelyn Lozada, Sexual Fantasy: Sex in public
(Gina) The New York Jugs: Kristen Stewart, Vanessa Hudgens, Julianne Hough , Nadya Suleman ,Heidi Klum , Taylor Swift, Sexual Fantasy: Cheating scandal
(Andrea) Minnesota Dykings: Lindsey Lohan, Paz de la Huerta, Brandi Glanville, Miley Cyrus, Victoria Silvstedt, Emily Ratajkowski, Sexual Fantasy: Lezzing out
(Elise) Pittsburgh Feelers: Cameron Diaz , Sofia Vergara , Snookie , Nikki Minaj, Kate Moss , Blake Lively, Sexual Fantasy: threesome
(Kevin) Indianapolis Clits : Mila Kunis, Selena Gomez, Stacy Keibler, Katy Perry, Arianny Celeste, Kate Upton, Sexual Fantasy: Sexting
We kicked things off with our nudity expert Mr. Skin, who gave us the latest in celebrity nudity. Mr. Skin also shared his top celebrity camel toe pictures which included Katy Perry, Mariah Carey and Taylor Swift! Fresh off his Emmy nomination for Breaking Bad, we were thrilled to welcome Mark Margolis to our mini mansion! Instead of an Emmy, Kevin and Andrea presented Mark with a special Heffy Award. As we got into another round of The Sex Factor, Mark hung around to help judge our three contestants and their sexy talents. Lindsey, Molly and Allison each performed their sexiest talents consisting of: Topless lap dancing, topless belly dancing and the splits. Our judges gave the winning title to Molly!
Posted in Uncategorized on September 27, 2012 by Playboy Morning Show
This morning we talked about one of Andrea’s favorite insects, BEES! Just kidding. Given that Andrea hates bees, Kevin gave her three scenarios and asked her to choose which one she would prefer to put herself in. That didn’t go so well, so we checked in with John Hafernik instead, a professor of Biology at SF State University and ZomBEE expert! It’s true they do exist!
Then we got into Playboy’s voted Top 10 party Schools. Ranking one through ten first up was:
1.) University of Virginia
2.) University of Southern California
3.) University of Florida
4.) University of Texas
5.) University of Wisconsin
6.) University of Georgia
7.) Vanderbilt University
8.) Tulane University
9.) Texas Christian University
10.) Ohio State University
Also, voted as number one university for best sex life was the University of North Carolina, and number one in nightlife was Southern Methodist University. If you are interested in more rankings check out page 84-85 in the October 2012 Playboy issue. After, we then nominated Heffy Awards from Kevin, Andrea, Gina, Elise and Jaron?
Today we started off the Power Hour by getting to know Jessie Cruickshank, co-host to Jamie Kennedy on the CW’s game show, “Oh Sit!” Kevin was able to pronounce her last name correctly – which sounds like ‘crook-shank,’ even though Andrea heard it as “Crook-shit.” The gorgeous and classy Jessie took it in stride, saying she wanted to be called ONLY that moving forward! Jessi talked about her birth in a small town A&W Restaurant in Canada, along with why she doesn’t seem to be popular with the lesbians. We also had three sexy models, Caitlyn, Danielle and Lisa, join us for everyone’s favorite naked trivia game show, “Know it or Show It!” Today’s categories included Oh Oh Oh-Obama – questions about The President, There’s a Bacon Shortage and we Really Need a Cure – questions about meat, and Penises and Other Things You Can Sit On. Of course, the beautiful ladies failed to answer the questions correctly, so they lost clothing and we got to see it all!
Posted in Uncategorized on September 25, 2012 by Playboy Morning Show
The replacement referees have officially lost control! Given that the NFL is the biggest deal in American sports, the NFL deserves all the criticism it’s getting after Monday night’s controversial ending! Kevin was still noticeably upset about the replacement refs so he gave one of the refs a call. His name is Cookie!
We discovered a possible new Heffy nominee this morning! Stanley Jerry Hoffman is just your average 83-year-old from Southern California who happens to make his own brand of “politically driven Cyber Rap.” Our new nominee also goes by the name Kwayzar!
We checked in with Scott Alexander, the Games & Gadgets guru! Next, we got into “Carol and Andrea, Gay Women Straight Talk.” Our guest today was Kerrie Hopkins, who has spent years studying personality traits through brain and cognitive studies; an adjunct to psychological studies. She is also a collaborator with business, marketing & legal experts. She is the author of BREAKING THE NAME CODE: Define Your Name, Design Your Life.
We began today’s Power Hour by chatting with Lisa Lampanelli about her “Forget Money – Get a Job with Sex Appeal” column in the October 2012 Playboy issue. Lisa considers chefs, firemen and policemen to be the sexiest workers. Lisa also shared her hatred towards men’s genitals and uncircumcised penises. You can see “Comedy’s Lovable Queen of Mean” perform this Sunday, Sept. 30th at the Canyon Club in Agoura. Next,things got a little out of control when comedians Jo Koy, Owen Benjamin and Skylar Stone joined us to judge “The Fuck Me Voice,” our Playboy take on the hit NBC show, “The Voice.” They faced the wall blindfolded as, one-by-one, our contestants introduced themselves and shared a sexy story. Based on their voices alone, our judges decided whether or not to turn their chairs around, and choose a contestant to be on their team. Sklyer chose Pat – a GUY, Owen picked beautiful Paula, but it was Jo Koy who swept the competition! He scored two gorgeous models for his team, Lindsey and Destiny, and they were all crowned the winners of “The Fuck Me Voice”!
Today, Kevin shared details of his “epic weekend,” which included a trip to the Playboy Mansion! Cooper Hefner invited Kevin (probably by accident) to celebrate his 21st birthday with him and a few friends. The guest list for Cooper’s intimate pool party gathering included Playboy icon and Kevin’s masturbation fantasy girl, Pamela Anderson! Kevin actually managed to score a HUG from Pam, by pretending he was an unemployed valet attendant. She felt sorry for him. Kevin also got to hobnob with TV A-listers at an exclusive Emmy after-party! Bryan Cranston? CHECK. Sofia Vergara? CHECK. Kobe Bryant? CHECK! Kevin even managed to meet another one of his masturbation fantasy girls, Emmanuelle Chriqui. Needless to say, he’s on his way to a NAME DROPPER Friday Award this week.
Kevin and Brian Olea celebrate Cooper Hefner’s 21st
Kevin and Playboy magazine Editorial Director, Jimmy Jellinek
We spoke with Miss June 1997, Playmate Carrie Stevens, about her new catering company, Centerfold Chefs – bringing beautiful women and food to you! That’s right, Carrie and her team of Playmates, Cyber Girls and other gorgeous models will create a menu for your special event – no matter what it is – and serve it up with some sexy! Carrie says her next gig is a lesbian baby shower. Andrea wants to join her team! Kevin just wants an invite.
Today we welcomed back our favorite little person, Brad Williams. He told us that he recently got pulled over with a black guy in his car. Brad said that the cop let him go, but his friend got 5 years. (Yes, you can hear that joke and more by checking out Brad’s podcast, About Last Night.) Brad also talked a masseuse into having sex with him. However, he paid her for the massage. We’re still not sure that’s legal… Playboy models Carrie Lynn and Danielle joined us for a round of ”Can a Bunny Make a Funny?” Hot women telling original jokes! If they made Kevin, Andrea and Brad laugh, the ladies scored cash. If not, they lost clothing. In the end, our ‘bunnies’ ended up naked – just the way we like it!
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