Video Slam Brought to You By September Carrino and Patrice Hollis

September Carrino Human CalendarWelcome to September!

Ever think it would be cool to have not just a birthday but instead an entire month dedicated to you? Well, it’s a cool idea but face it — you won’t ever have that. That would be ridiculous.

The closest you might come is having the same name as a month, and enjoying wisecracks all month long about how it’s “your” month. Such is the case with September Carrino, who owns a certain month (hint: September) and will be acting as Girlwatcher’s very own human calendar. Here she is telling you what day it is today.
September Carrino Human Calendar

Want a video of September? Too bad! September doesn’t make videos with her clothes on, it’s against her religion or something. But we do have a number of sexy videos that were on our radar this week and we think you’ll enjoy:

Christine Marie tweeted this one, it’s a flashmob thing that ends up with her in a swimsuit. It’s a one-piece, but still nice.

Two models dressed as Wonder Woman and Supergirl? Yes, please. Courtesy of Diana Knight:

Diana Knight is a lover not a fighter? Really? If you say so. Here’s a lover and a fighter — Emily Addison, who was just named Twisty’s Treat of the Year. Keep on punching, Emily:

Nicole Scherzinger gets “Wet.” Nice.

Did you know that Exxxotica took place this past weekend? Well it did, and all sorts of adult actresses convened and looked way slutty together. As they tend to do for a living. All in good fun, we love the pornistas! Here’s Rubberdoll, who is not a porn star but a fetish model. She has some dude in the stocks and is forcing him to stare at her nearly-covered breasts. Cruel mistress!

Speaking of staring at boobs — hey, September may be September Carrino’s month, but September 1 is Playmate Patrice Hollis‘s birthday. Happy birthday to her! Here we have a dude interviewing her. Or interviewing her breasts. Or Gawking at her breasts and pretending to listen to what she says. Whatever, it’s good stuff.

You know Paz de la Huerta as that bad, bad girl on Boardwalk Empire. She’s also in a new lingerie commercial. The gist of it is — Ladies, you will love your new undies so much you will show them off in public like you’re Paris Hilton showing off your lack-of-undies. Here’s how you do it:

And finally, here is a public service video: How to do a breast exam, starring Patrice Hollis. Wait, another Patrice? What the hell, it’s her birthday and we’ve been looking for an excuse to run this clip for a couple of years. NOTE: Breasts in this video are extra large for the purpose of demonstration. Do not be alarmed if the breasts you get to examine are not this large.