Is Nicki Minaj’s Rump Fe’ Real?

Nicki Minaj

The people have spoken (well some of them, anyway) and their beliefs are clear: Nicki Minaj was shaking a bit more than what her momma gave her at the VMAs last night. From Twitter:

DarkHustle: “Aye so Nicki Minaj is sexy as fuck, but why she put pillows in the back of her pants? Get shots like everyone else, baby.”

SamijewsoFINE: “I wonder why nicki can’t shake her ass. Uhhhhh… Maybe cuz it’s fake?”

GroundhogStatus: “Nicki MInaj’s ass is huge we all kno. But it’s fake, it’ll never feel like the real thing c’mon people.”

StacieLaneXXX: “nicki is bomb I gave her her props but her ass is too fake I like it when she first got n done”

StacieLaneXXX: “Man Nicki Minaji needs to quit with the ass shots, just like some of these chicks out here, enough is enough already yo ass is phat enough”

Those last two were from a bona fide porn star, who surely must be an expert by virtue of her profession. (Eh, maybe.) But Stacie Lane and Dark Hustle also touch on something we’ve never been quite clear on—what exactly do we mean when we say “fake booty”? Do we mean padded underwear—say, like the products one might buy from feelfoxy.com or lovemybubbles.com? Or does one, as Stacie says, get one’s ass “done” with “shots” of something?

We’ve been skeptical about butt implants. Do they really exist? We have never doubted that such a procedure could be done; if a woman can put something in her breasts to pump them up, surely she can do the same in her butt. But you don’t sit on your breasts; that would seem to be a huge difference. Breast implants can rupture, and wear and tear on them is minimal. If you had butt implants you’d be putting over half your body weight on them dozens of times a day—how many times can you flatten a balloon before it pops? And we won’t even speculate on how strange the butt implants would feel to the implantee. (Well, we will speculate with the phrase “permanently implanted hemorrhoid pillow,” but that is merely speculation.)

Turns out we’re ignorant—TV plastic surgeon Dr. Robert Rey has a page on butt implants, with before and after pictures, so they must be real. Guess it’s true—you really do learn something every day. And today that thing is about butt implants.

But back to Nicki—is her booty stock or tricked-out? You be the judge…

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