Hot 100 List Snubs Our Girlfriend, Kate Upton

Kate UptonHow’s THIS for a Top 10?:

Christina Hendricks
Sofia Vergara
Kristen Bell
Amber Heard
Emmy Rossum
Adriana Lima
Ashley Greene
Brooklyn Decker
Miranda Kerr
Kate Upton

Whoa, great picks, Maxim! Only here’s one problem: That’s not Maxim’s top 10. That’s a list of girls left out of Maxim‘s Top 10. Left far out of the top 10. In fact, here is where they rate per Maxim:

77. Christina Hendricks
71. Sofia Vergara
61. Kristen Bell
53. Amber Heard
49. Emmy Rossum
46. Adriana Lima
43. Ashley Greene
42. Brooklyn Decker
40. Miranda Kerr
39. Kate Upton

When Sofia Vergara is deemed the 71st hottest woman and Kate Upton can’t get any higher than 39, you just have to wonder. Wonder who’s in charge over there. Wonder what they’re smoking. Wonder why you bought this dumb magazine. Wonder — and this is really it — who is in the frickin’ top 10? This fairly clever video counts down the whole thing:

That top 10 is:

10. Adrianne Palicki
9. Malin Akerman
8. Megan Fox
7. Emma Stone
6. Jennifer Lawrence
5. Olivia Wilde
4. Katy Perry
3. Mila Kunis
2. Olivia Munn
1. Bar Refaeli

Sure, these lists are subjective, and sure, we are talking about an elite level of hotness, but some things just aren’t right. Kate Upton at #39 isn’t right. She called us up in tears and we had to promise to give her a lot of back rubs. There, there, Kate, it’s gonna be alright.

Here she is in the latest batch of Beach Bunny Swimwear swimsuits, “The Bronze Collection.”