MAN CRUSH OF THE WEEK: TIM TEBOW?
IN LAST WEEK’S POST, I basically said the Oakland Raiders not eliminating the Denver Broncos would make Tim Tebow live not only for another week, but pretty much forever. And that’s just what happened. Yeah, so I’m bragging a little.
I have made my relative hatred of Tim Tebow well-known on the screen here at The Smoking Jacket. But most of this hate comes not because he is a super religious dude or anything. Most of it is because he is a really terrible quarterback. Like the dude can’t throw a football well, one of the key components to being a quarterback post-1906.
Tebow posted, yes, 316 passing yards (side note: nothing makes me dislike the Internet more than the number of people pointing out that 316 yards is like John 3:16) against the league’s top pass defense (minus a couple key contributors). Sure, the 80-yard touchdown pass was mostly due to failed coverage. And he completed less than 50 percent of his passes. But Tim Tebow actually looked like a person who could throw a football for a living. And did so in rather epic fashion. The Broncos have no real business beating a team like the Steelers (and will almost certainly get destroyed by the Patriots next week) but the fact that Tebow put together a legitimately great game and managed to cause an all-time Twitter record for most tweets makes me forced to recognize that he was pretty awesome, and not just for Tim Tebow (but especially for Tim Tebow).
If Tebow wasn’t religious, we’d love this guy who sort of sucks but just constantly wins. Underdogs are a great story. If his name wasn’t Tim Tebow and was instead, say, Jim Chapin, this would go down as one of the most impressive playoff performances ever.
So good job, Jim Chapin.
DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK: NCAA FOOTBALL
“Daddy, I fell asleep during the BSC Title game,” said my fictional son.
“Don’t worry, you weren’t the only one,” I said.
“Who is the best team in college football?” My fictional son asked.
“Well, I don’t know. Alabama won, but they had already lost to LSU this year.”
“But wasn’t the BCS made just so there wouldn’t be any doubt about who the National Champion was?”
“Well, yeah sorta.”
“So if the National Championship Game doesn’t matter, then really none of college football matters either, right?”
“I mean, yeah I guess. LSU beating Alabama earlier really makes no difference now.”
“Plus every other bowl game is basically an exhibition match with no real bearing on anything.”
“Wow, how did you learn to talk like that in first grade, fictional son?”
“The internet. I don’t think I like college football any more. They need to do something different. Like a way so that it’s clear who the champion is, so that the entire season matters.”
“Well it’s not that easy. There’s a lot of teams and conferences.”
“So you mean we are stuck with the BCS?”
“But as long as they have the BCS, college football is basically pointless.”
“I mean, it’s still fun to watch and stuff.”
“So is the NFL, and that actually matters.”
“True. It’s past your bedtime, you have school tomorrow.”
“One more question. Why didn’t Jeff Bagwell make the Hall-of-Fame?”
“That’s something I can’t answer, fictional son.”
If nothing else, college football being pretty much ruined this year might actually cause them to change the way things are run. A playoff system isn’t perfect, but the BCS is about as far from perfect as it can get. I really think in my life there will be a playoff. And maybe Alabama, a team I thought was the best team all year, will finally make a push toward it.
So in the long run this might work out. But right now, college football is super douchey.