In regular fantasy football leagues, the playoffs start now. For Playmates Pilar Lastra and Deanna Brooks, it’s time to wake up from their nap together. After posting a 10-2 record to start the season, the girls lost last week to superfan/stalker Erik, who may or may not have to stay 100 yards away from Deanna at all times.
Our new challenger is Chris from fantasyomatic.com, whose shit talk was strangely tame. He undoubtedly will regret sending us this Christmas-themed, G-rated rant, which for some reason includes the phrase “boo boo lipped Brett Favre.”
PILAR AND DEANNA-
What a fine opportunity this is for fantasyoMatic. Although I must admit, when I think of me and two playmates, the only ‘Fantasy’ I think of has nothing to do with football.
For many fantasy leagues, this is the playoffs and it is an honor to be going to head to head against Pilar. Since your beloved Cowboys won’t get anywhere near the postseason this year, at least you get to participate in this postseason, even though it’s a fantasy. Deanna, it’s time for you guys to end this ridiculous string of beatdowns you have laid upon our fellow fantasy football pundits.
This week it ends. So do your best to text message all your NFL player buddies and collude all you want, as the fantasyomatic grinch will bring sadness to hooville in time to kick off the xmas season. Santa got our letter and we asked for a royal butt kicking in my stocking.
While we will have you crying like boo boo lipped Brett Favre at a press conference after this loss, Fantasyomatic will rejoice like Jenn Sterger on her lawsuit payday.
At this time, I’d like to announce that Deanna and Pilar have cheated with their week 14 roster. The girls picked stud Cleveland Browns running back Peyton Hillis at wide receiver, claiming it was kosher because he’s amassed around 400 yards receiving this season. I’ll let it slide for now, but the TSJ authority may have to investigate further once this competition ends.
Let’s take a look at our new lineups:
Pilar and Deanna’s Week 14 lineup
QB: Joe Flacco
RB: Arian Foster
RB: Chris Johnson
WR: Peyton Hillis (“Whatever. When the kid has 400 receiving yards he can play WR.”)
WR: Greg Jennings
TE: Antonio Gates
Defense: San Diego
Kicker: Robbie Gould
FantasyOmatic Chris’ Week 14 lineup
QB: Aaron Rodgers
RB: Knowshon Moreno
RB: Michael Turner
WR: Jeremy Maclin
WR: Mike Wallace
TE: Jacob Tamme
K: Nate Keading