Beauty vs. The Beast – Fantasy Football Tournament – Week 12

We’re getting things started a little earlier this week because the Detroit Lions decided to play on Thanksgiving 140 years ago or something. Playmates Deanna Brooks and Pilar Lastra dominated Phil from last week to improve their record to 9-2. Next up is Brandon from, a cocky SOB who had the audacity to presume that the ladies were cut from the lingerie football league:

Pilar and Deanna,

Nine and two, huh? Impressive record, but look who you’ve been playing against: Guyism? Gunaxin? Sure, they’re good friends of the Bros, but playing them is kinda like playing a dodge ball team comprised entirely of kids who wear headgear braces: You know you’re going to win before a ball is even thrown. My covert Playboy insiders inform me you also gave your intern the greatest football ass-whooping he’s received since wearing a pink Power Rangers jersey to peewee training camp in the fourth grade. Congratulations on beating up on the free labor. Class move.

It’s time for a blogger to rise to the occasion and silence this lucky streak. BroBible is prepared to do just that. But, before we go any further, can we get a tally of how many times Playboy’s photo department has taken a red pen (link NSFW!) to your collective photo shoots? I’d love to get an over/under (purely for inter-office betting purposes). Those marked-up editorial composites will give me something else to chuckle about while boozing through the Thanksgiving holiday and whooping your asses between the hash marks.

I’ll start pumping the brakes there. I don’t want to get too mean because I’ve been stealing reading Playboy since I was old enough to reach the top rack at the corner gas station. Plus, I feel bad for you: It’s quite obvious your Lingerie Football League applications were lost in the mail. In the unlikely event you manage to win, I’m willing to pop a few tops from my private stock of Four Loko. But if you lose (and you will), I fully expect a complete turkey dinner with all the fixins, cooked naked, of course. I’ll provide the whipped cream for the dessert.


Just a side note—The girls demanded that they get both Houston tight ends because the team’s injury report isn’t released until the weekend. Yeah, Pilar and Deanna aren’t messing around.

Here are the Thanksgiving rosters and week 11 results:

Pilar and Deanna’s Week 12 lineup:

QB: Matt Schaub
RB: Mike Goodson
RB: Adrain Peterson
WR: Santonio Holmes
WR: Dwayne Bowe
TE: Joel Dreesen for now, but we’re waiting to see if Owen Daniels is healthy enough to start.
Defense: Steelers
Kicker:  Robbie Gould

BroBible Brandon’s Week 12 Lineup:

QB: Phillip Rivers
RB: Arian Foster
RB: Frank Gore
WR: Calvin Johnson
WR: Roddy White
TE: Jacob Tamme
K: David Akers
D: Philadelphia Eagles

Gunaxin Phil’s Week 11 results:

QB: Mike Vick 19
RB: Chris Johnson 13
RB: Adrian Peterson 8
WR: Calvin Johnson 10
WR: Reggie Wayne 16
TE: Antonio Gates 0
Defense: New Orleans 4
Kicker: Sebastian Janikowski 4

Pilar and Deanna’s Week 11 results:

QB: Drew Brees 27
RB: Jammal Charles 11
RB: Frank Gore 5
WR: Roddy White 10
WR: Santonio Holmes 24
TE: Jacob Tamme 6
Defense: Baltimore Ravens 23
Kicker:  Neil Rackers 9
TOTAL: 115

Listen to the Fantasy Fantasy Show with Pilar Lastra, Deanna Brooks and Scott Huff on Sirius XM 99 Wednesdays from 3-4 p.m. PDT.  Call in live to the show at 877-205-9796.