Ballbreaker: Kinsey Schofield
We ask a sexy babe what pisses her off. Today’s Ballbreaker: Kinsey Schofield
PEOPLE WHO ASSUME I CAN REPAIR OFFICE MACHINERY BECAUSE I AM ON “THE TWITTER”
No, I don’t know why the fax machine isn’t working…and I am not a pro when it comes to paper jams and the copy machine. Nothing makes me more hostile than the oldsters assuming that I am an expert on all things technology because I am capable of updating my Facebook or Twitter status. I will tap out 140 characters or less; I will not root around in office machinery and jeopardize my manicure.
MIDGETS WHO HATE THE WORD “MIDGET”
I am unsympathetic to midgets who hate the use of the word midget. According to Wikipedia, a midget is “an extremely short person.” If you’re extremely short, then it is a fact that you’re a midget. It’s like when old people don’t like being called old. Reality Check: If you need a portable set of stairs to check your mailbox, you’re extremely short, and thus, a midget. Embrace the term. Or if you can’t embrace it, at least come up with some cool new alternative like the cast of Jersey Shore has done. Terms like “grenades” or “gorilla-juiceheads” are just fun to say.
CELEBRITIES’ CHILDREN WHO THRIVE ON FAME BY PROXY
Meghan McCain sucks. The daughter of John McCain, Meggie spends her time writing books with words like “dirty” and “sexy” in the title (when there is absolutely nothing dirty or sexy within), TwitPic’ing web-cam shots of her rack and hanging out with fame-whore Tila Tequila. Rumer Willis, Sean Stewart, Ashley Hamilton, Bristol Palin–go away. Most celebrities’ children who go into the entertainment industry have absolutely no redeeming qualities nor an ounce of talent. (Tori Spelling: You are an exception. You are an American icon and we appreciate your lengthy resume of Lifetime movies.)
THE HYPE OF SOCIAL MEDIA
It is not the cure for cancer. It can be a phenomenal marketing tool, but like all things Internet, social media’s influence wanes as marketing and PR companies start whoring out their agendas by taking advantage of the next big online hub. I enter my likes and interests on Facebook so that Facebook can strategize what banners it will serve me; I send out a Tweet that I probably shouldn’t have had that brownie, and every gym in southern California starts following me. As our pages become polluted with invasive product placement, we–the target audience and taste-makers–will drop off. The Internet is supposed to be organic. Suits ruin everything.
BEING “GOOSED” BY ANY DOG THAT ISN’T MINE
I can’t help but be mildly offended every time a dog that isn’t mine decides that they want to know what I had for lunch. Having to look a stranger in the eye after their dog has just stuck their nose up your dress is shockingly more uncomfortable than you would imagine. Especially if they’re the opposite sex, because I automatically see the dog as his wingman and this a crude ice-breaker, part of their plot to collect my digits.
TEENAGERS WITH “DON’T STOP BELIEVIN’” RING-TONES
If you are currently in high school, or even college, and Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’” is your ringtone, I hope you get your ass kicked. Your parents probably conceived you to that song and, frankly, that is gross. This move is not retro or cool–and it pretty much signifies to the world that you’re still a virgin.
Kinsey Schofield is a TV personality, social media expert and celebrity blogger. She’s on the Twitter, she’s on the Facebook, she’s on the YouTube, she’s on the Tumblr–you get the idea. This week you can catch her on The Adam Carolla Show on October 27 and Fox News’ Red Eye with Greg Gutfield on October 29.
HOT LINKS
“Ballbreaker: Kinsey Schofield”
2:46 pm on October 26th, 2010
She has an interesting take on social media for someone who’s major claim to fame is being a ‘social media expert and celebrity blogger’. I can’t say I disagree but its a rather interesting stance to take its almost like biting the hand that feeds you!
2:54 pm on October 26th, 2010
I give her a 10
3:06 pm on October 26th, 2010
She can’t handle constructive criticism and is hostile towards anyone who has views that differ from her own. I will admit that Kinsey is a witty and talented writer, but that does not negate the fact that she has some growing up to do.
3:20 pm on October 26th, 2010
Great take on the Social Media Scene.
Clever writing. “D” must be a world class text analysis expert because I don’t know what the fuck she’s talking about.
I look forward to hearing more from Kinsey!
3:44 pm on October 26th, 2010
It’s interesting that she is accusing Meghan McCain of being a fame whore. I remember Kinsey from before she gained such popularity. When she randomly added anyone and everyone (myself included) to her MySpace, and very openly chased celebrities around just to get pictures with them. When she was desperate to get on ANY reality show such as MTV’s “Next” and the Paris Hilton BFF show. In fact, you could say that Kinsey is still a fame whore … read her Twitter feed and notice that she name drops on a regular basis. Oh, and considering she has photos of herself in a toilet stall flashing her undies on MySpace and Flickr, I’d say she is a hypocrite calling out Meghan’s cleavage shots.
I have to agree with D’s comment about Kinsey being unpleasant to those who challenge her opinions. On Twitter she has argued with multiple people who do not share her beliefs. Sadly her arguments usually include her pointing out that she has 40k + followers and that the other person has less than 1,000. Because we all know the amount of followers you have dictates your character, right Kinsey?
If Kinsey reads this, I am guessing she will post something along the lines of “Haters keep me relevant” on her Twitter. For someone who claims that “How to Win Friends and Influence People” is one of her favorite books, I have a hard time believing she’s ever read it. Actually that’s not true. I believe she read Part Two of the book, entitled “Six Ways to Make People Like You”. Unfortunately I think she skipped past chapter 1 of Part Three entitled, “You Can’t Win an Argument”. There is a very wise piece of advice in that chapter … “The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.”
I’m not saying Kinsey is a bad person, she is just not my cup of tea. At least she is pretty, right?
3:48 pm on October 26th, 2010
Lisa, bitter?
3:49 pm on October 26th, 2010
“Lisa,”
Clearly you are a dedicated fan considering the fact that you have kept up so closely and creepily on the last 5 years of my life. Please send me your address and I’d love to get you an autographed picture. Blessings to you,
Kinsey
3:56 pm on October 26th, 2010
I can tell from reading the post that Kinsey is opinionated and takes an interesting stance. This is by far the most entertaining ball breaker yet… plus she’s hot.
Best part of the post BY FAR are the haters. You guys sure are doing a crack job of keeping up with someone who you seem to have a problem with.
Keep up the good work, Kinsey. The road to success is paved in doormats that talk a lot of shit.
3:58 pm on October 26th, 2010
Nah, I just don’t like hypocrites. I actually used to enjoy following Kinsey and her career. I read her AZ Weekly articles on a regular basis and thought she seemed fun. I took her what she was, a girl who created an online persona based on pop culture, shopping, and taking pictures with celebrities. Shallow yes, but admittedly fun and girly. My opinion of Kinsey changed when I noticed some of her negative interactions with people on Twitter, and also noticed her in-consistantcies. For example, she did a charity benefit at Skid Row on Mother’s Day, then a few weeks later openly made fun of the homeless on her Twitter. When someone called her out, she simply deleted her post and did not acknowledge that she was in fact wrong. Honestly I hope she grows as a person and does something really awesome and meaningful with her career, as opposed to basing her importance of the number of strangers that follow her on Twitter.
4:05 pm on October 26th, 2010
Way to have my comments blocked Kinsey. Can’t take a differing opinion can you? Thank you Kinsey for confirming everything I just wrote.
4:06 pm on October 26th, 2010
Lisa… is your real name Val?
4:08 pm on October 26th, 2010
Schmidty you are fucking right on!
4:10 pm on October 26th, 2010
“Lisa” we are all glad that you feel so free to judge others… your halo is tarnishing… clearly you have a busy life
4:11 pm on October 26th, 2010
Great Article. Kinsey is hot!
Lisa, take notes much? Hahaha
5:55 pm on October 26th, 2010
Kinsey Rocks!
8:04 pm on October 26th, 2010
guys me and kinsey actually dated….. sooooo get on my level . my heart will forever be yours kinsey <3
3:41 am on October 30th, 2010
In a scale from 1 – 10, Kinsey is a 27.
Kinsey, since I don’t believe it when Dusty (lying comment # 16) says that he dated you, will you marry me????
3:44 am on October 30th, 2010
Lisa, you are 1 pathetic jealous cunt.
10:26 am on March 17th, 2011
I did an interview with Kinsey on my podcast and she’s awesome.
http://podcasterswithattitude.blogspot.com/2010/11/episode-39-guest-kinsey-schofield.html
Check it out if you want.