Afternoon News Explosion

newsThe world is a busy place. Things don’t stop happening just because you’re chained to a cubicle for eight hours everyday. Here’s what’s been going on around the globe while your employer was busy crushing your soul.

Randy Quaid Flees to Canada

Randy Quaid mugshotThe crazy train that Randy Quaid is currently riding shows no signs of slowing down anytime soon. A week or so ago, Cousin Eddie and his wife were arrested for squatting in a guest house on the grounds of a property the couple used to own but no longer do. Now, the actor is seeking refuge in Canada from an alleged “Hollywood Hit Squad” who he blames for, among other things, the recent death of Australian actor Heath Ledger. Sadly, we’re not making any of this up. Be it from the dangers of a hit squad or the ravages of whatever mental illness he’s soon to be diagnosed with, we hope the Randy Quaid stays safe.

Paul the Octopus

Paul the OctopusSad news from the ocean today. You may remember Paul the Prognosticating Octopus from this past summer’s World Cup. Paul correctly predicted the winner of that and several other prominent sporting events in the past few years. But sadly, his gambling days are over. We’re sad to report that Paul the Octopus tragically died in his sleep last night. And with that, we officially have no reason to care about soccer again. R.I.P. Paul. Poor guy never even got the chance to predict a Chicago Cubs World Series.

The Sony Walkman is Dead

Sony Cassette WalkmanBad news for you late technology adopter types. Replacement parts for your portable cassette players may soon become scarce. Word comes down from Japan today that Sony has officially put a fork in the legendary Cassette Walkman. You can probably still snag some good deals on Ebay though. If you’re the type who feels that music is best listened to when you have to manually fast forward through songs you don’t like, you might want to consider stocking up for the future.’s Top 49 Most Influential Men

Steve SlaterWe’d be lying if we said we weren’t far more interested in their annual list of the 99 Most Desirable Women, but with that said, there are some pretty intriguing choices in’s annual Top 49 Most Influential Men list. For starters, not a single TSJ staffer made the cut. That’s a heinous oversight if we’ve ever seen one. But good call on getting top notch job quitter Steve Slater on the list. You may remember him as the man who snapped over an unruly passenger and escaped via a JetBlue emergency chute after talking a little shit via intercom and grabbing a couple beers for good measure. He’s our number one pick for sure. To see who picked for the most influential man of 2010, check out the complete list here.

My Dad is a Bro

My Dad is a BroIs your dad cooler than the other side of the pillow? Let the world know by sending your best picture of pops broing the hell out to the fine folks at They’re putting together what should be a phenomenal book for release on Father’s Day, 2011. Using user submitted photos, they’ll compile the best shots of dads all around this great land doing awesome shit. Got a good pic of dad shredding the guitar or pulling off an expertly executed keg stand? Upload it to the My Dad is a Bro user submission page and your old man may be published for all the world to see. We can’t think of a better Father’s Day gift.